My Eighth Adventure(s) A rant about apartment living

Apartment Living Rants and Solutions

   

When living in an apartment, there are both advantages and disadvantage.  The advantages of apartment living is the cost, the ability to move without having to sell a home, and being close to the city.  These advantages make life easy, but do the disadvantages out-weigh the advantages?  

Disadvantage One: Stairs (cue dramatic music)

In every apartment building there will always be stairs.  It is sad to say but unfortunately it is a fact of life.  When living on the bottom floor most of the time you don’t need the stairs, and even on the second floor you aren’t really effected by them until you get to the third floor.  On the third floor you will need to carry full bags of groceries up three flights of stairs.  Or maybe you just moved in, you will have to carry all of your crap up three flights of stairs and finally get to the top only to realize that there is more crap that you now have to bring up. 

Solution:  Escalators and/or elevators

Elevators and escalators are such wonderful inventions.  They are the amazing devices that carry us lazy Americans from one floor to another.  Sure we won’t get the exercise that we would get if we walked up the stairs but this way we won’t have to collapse when we finally get to the top and then drag ourselves to the shower after our rigorous uphill climb.

Disadvantage Two: Noise

If you live in an apartment then you already know what I am talking about.  There are always those people outside your window at one in the morning. You know who I’m talking about those people who feel like they have to yell their jokes to all of the Puget Sound area.  And then there are those little kids who are just coming home at midnight and are unaware of the people they have just woken up upstairs.

 
Solution: PLEASE SHUT UP!!!

If you really have to talk then please go inside. And to those people who bring their young children home between the hours of eleven o-clock and midnight every single night, I suggest you make sure you kids don’t wake up the whole neighborhood when they come home please and thank you.

Disadvantage Two and a half:  Those little yappy dogs(two and a half because it applies to disadvantage two)

There’s this old guy with these two little dogs named Salt and Pepper.  He takes them outside every morning around eight thirty. They come out barking and they don't stop.  If someone were lucky enough to have the ability to sleep through that imagine what their dream would be.  

Solution: Please explain to you annoying dogs that there is plenty of grass for the both of them.  Also a muzzle would help too if that doesn’t work.

Disadvantage Three:  Those creepy voices

No I am not a schizophrenic.  When you’re in the bathroom in my apartment you can hear the people on the other side of the wall.  If they turn on the shower, you can hear it, if the yell from their kitchen, you can hear it, if they flush, you can hear it, and if they pee loud enough you can hear that to.  One time I even heard someone singing in the shower.  The first time I heard this I thought Michael was up.  (He does that sometimes because he likes to get up and kick me out of the bathroom so he can pee on the toilet seat when I am suppose to be getting ready for school.) 

Solution…Thicker walls?  Actually I have no solution for this, NEXT!

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